5 Questions Every Father Should Ask Himself
The 24/7 Dad knows his role in the family. He knows he is a model for his sons on how to be a good man and father and for his daughters on what they should look for in a husband and father for their children.
Here are five questions that every father should take time to answer. They are as follows:
1. Self-Awareness. The 24/7 Dad is aware of himself as a man and aware of how important he is to his family. He knows his moods, feelings and emotions; capabilities, strengths, and challenges. He is responsible for his behavior and knows that his growth depends on how well he knows and accepts himself. He also knows that his ability to be with his children is affected by the choices he has made and accepts responsibility for his choices.
The 24/7 Dad asks himself: How well do I know myself?
2. Caring for Self. The 24/7 Dad takes care of himself. He gets annual physicals, eats the right foods, works out to stay in shape, and learns about the world he lives in. He has a strong connection to his family and community, and chooses friends who support his healthy choices. The 24/7 Dad models for his children that he respects and likes himself because he makes good choices.
The 24/7 Dad asks himself: How well do I care for myself?
3. Fathering Skills. The 24/7 Dad knows his role in the family. He knows he is a model for his sons on how to be a good man and father and for his daughters on what they should look for in a husband and father for their children. He knows that, if possible, he should be involved in the daily life of his children; from getting them up, dressed and fed in the mornings to attending parent-teacher conferences, to supporting them in sports and other interests and activities, to helping them with their homework, to tucking them in at night. The 24/7 Dad uses his knowledge of the unique skills he and his wife/the mother of his children brings to raising his children. In other words, he knows the difference between “fathering” and “mothering.”
The 24/7 Dad asks himself: How well do I “Father?”
4. Parenting Skills. The 24/7 Dad nurtures his children. He knows how his parenting skills help to develop their physical, emotional, intellectual, social, spiritual, and creative needs. His children trust and feel safe with him because he cares about and nurtures them through the use of proven parenting skills. The 24/7 Dad uses discipline to teach and guide his children, not to threaten or harm them.
The 24/7 Dad asks himself: How well do I “Parent?”
5. Relationship Skills. The 24/7 Dad builds and maintains healthy relationships with his children, wife/mother of his children, other family members, friends, and community. He knows and values how relationships shape his children and their lives. The 24/7 Dad knows how the relationship with his wife/mother of his children affects his children and does his best to create a good relationship with her for the sake of his children. He always looks to improve the skills he uses to communicate with others.
The 24/7 Dad asks himself: How well do I relate?
photo credit: Fabiana Zonca