Hollywood Dads

A lot has been written and said about how the media treats dads. From TV commercials, to sitcoms, to blockbuster films, there are a lot of messages out there about and for dads. What are the movies really saying? A study on the portrayal of fathers in recent Hollywood blockbusters provided some eye-opening answers.

There are lots of dads in the movies. For starters, the study found that most of the recent “big money makers” coming out of Hollywood had father-characters in them. The last few years have seen movies like Finding Nemo, The Incredibles, and even Austin Powers 3 deal directly with fatherhood issues.

Plus, the portrayal of dads isn't all that bad. Movies like Night at the Museum, Meet the Fockers, and Signs have presented complex and generally positive dads who care about their children, and although they are flawed, they end up doing the right things for their kids

So, what can you learn from the movies?

Just Keep Swimming! If you've got small kids, you're probably familiar with Finding Nemo, where the dad, Marlin, goes on a trans-Atlantic search for his lost son, Nemo. The important lesson here: go the mile for your kids, and don't give up. As Marlin's pal Dora repeated: Just Keep Swimming!

Be (Annoyingly) Involved. In My Big Fat Greek Wedding, there is nothing Toula, the main character, wants more than to have her overinvolved family, including her father, leave her alone and let her live her life. But, as the movie plays out, you see that no matter how annoyed Toula gets, it's her family and her father who really shape her character, and in the end, remain a key part of who she is and the legacy she passes on to her own daughter. Don't let your teen's feigned (or possibly sincere) annoyance deter you from being involved. She'll thank you later.

Think about what your kids are learning. What do movies teach your kids about fatherhood? This study found that fathers in Hollywood movies made being a father a priority, but many of these dads simply weren't competent. For boys, many movies could teach them that they should be involved in their future children’s lives, but not worry about having good parenting skills. For girls, movies could teach them that they should expect the future father of their children to be involved, but not to actually expect him to have parenting skills. This could communicate to children that the burden of child care should continue to fall on moms since dads are not expected to be competent.

Movie dads often don't get it right all the time, but neither do real dads - or any parent! You as a dad should make sure that you are talking to your kids about what they are seeing in the movies they watch, especially when it comes to something as important as being a dad. And, next time you're watching your favorite blockbuster, take a moment to think about what the movie is saying about fatherhood...you may be surprised!