--- title: A Secret Weapon for Facilitators of Fatherhood Programs description: Read Christopher A. Brown's newest post on a secret weapon for facilitators of fatherhood programs. image: https://www.fatherhood.org/hubfs/A%20Secret%20Weapon%20for%20Facilitators%20of%20Fatherhood%20Programs.jpg --- [Skip to main content](https://www.fatherhood.org/championing-fatherhood/secret-weapon-facilitators-fatherhood-programs#main) - [![NFI mark](https://www.fatherhood.org/hubfs/NFI-Assets/images/NFI%20mark.svg)FATHERHOOD.ORG](https://www.fatherhood.org/) - [STORE.FATHERHOOD.ORG](https://store.fatherhood.org/) [![NFI_logo_blue_left (1) 1](https://www.fatherhood.org/hs-fs/hubfs/NFI-Assets/images/NFI_logo_blue_left%20(1)%201.png?width=149&height=82&name=NFI_logo_blue_left%20(1)%201.png) ![NFI_logo_blue_left (1) 1](https://www.fatherhood.org/hs-fs/hubfs/NFI-Assets/images/NFI_logo_blue_left%20(1)%201.png?width=119&height=65&name=NFI_logo_blue_left%20(1)%201.png) ![NFI_logo_blue_left (1) 1](https://www.fatherhood.org/hs-fs/hubfs/NFI-Assets/images/NFI_logo_blue_left%20(1)%201.png?width=119&height=66&name=NFI_logo_blue_left%20(1)%201.png) ![NFI_logo_blue_left (1) 1](https://www.fatherhood.org/hs-fs/hubfs/NFI-Assets/images/NFI_logo_blue_left%20(1)%201.png?width=89&height=49&name=NFI_logo_blue_left%20(1)%201.png) ](https://www.fatherhood.org) - [How To Build Strong Families](https://www.fatherhood.org/build-strong-families) - [Why Father Inclusion Matters](https://www.fatherhood.org/why-father-inclusion-matters) - Show submenu for Get Involved Get Involved - [Fatherhood Programs](https://www.fatherhood.org/solutions/programs-and-resources) - [Train Your Staff](https://www.fatherhood.org/solutions/staff-training) - [State, County, and City Agency Services](https://www.fatherhood.org/solutions/collaborative-services) Open main navigation Close main navigation - Show submenu for Get Informed Get Informed - [How To Build Strong Families](https://www.fatherhood.org/build-strong-families) - [Why Father Inclusion Matters](https://www.fatherhood.org/why-father-inclusion-matters) - [Father Stats & Infographics](https://www.fatherhood.org/father-absence-statistic) - Show submenu for Get Involved Get Involved - [Fatherhood Programs](https://www.fatherhood.org/solutions/programs-and-resources) - [Train Your Staff](https://www.fatherhood.org/solutions/staff-training) - [State, County, and City Agency Services](https://www.fatherhood.org/solutions/collaborative-services) - Show submenu for Get Started Get Started - [Find Your Stage of Father Inclusion](https://www.fatherhood.org/father-inclusion) - [How Father Friendly Is Your Organization?](https://www.fatherhood.org/father-friendly) - [Get In Touch](https://www.fatherhood.org/get-started) [Store](https://store.fatherhood.org/?hsLang=en) [Get In Touch](https://www.fatherhood.org/get-started) [Store](https://store.fatherhood.org/?hsLang=en) Show submenu for Get Started Get Started - [Fatherhood Data & Statistics](https://www.fatherhood.org/father-absence-statistic) - [How Father Friendly is Your Organization?](https://www.fatherhood.org/father-friendly) - [Other Free Resources](https://www.fatherhood.org/nfi-free-resources) - [Talk With us to Get Started](https://www.fatherhood.org/get-started) National Fatherhood Initiative Blog / [Latest Articles](https://www.fatherhood.org/championing-fatherhood) [NFI-Specific Programs & Resources](https://www.fatherhood.org/championing-fatherhood/topic/nfi-specific-programs-resources) # A Secret Weapon for Facilitators of Fatherhood Programs 1 min read ![Christopher A. Brown](https://www.fatherhood.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Images/chris_circle_icon.png?width=100&height=100&name=chris_circle_icon.png) [** Christopher A. Brown ** ](https://www.fatherhood.org/championing-fatherhood/author/christopher-a-brown) Chris serves as the President of National Fatherhood Initiative® (NFI), where he is responsible for overseeing the development and implementation of NFI's strategic plan and business model, as well as its operations and fundraising efforts. Picture this scene. You're facilitating a fatherhood program--perhaps National Fatherhood Initiative's 24/7 Dad® program (wink, wink). Several of the dads rarely if ever speak up. [You desperately want to know their thoughts and get them engaged with the program](https://www.fatherhood.org/keeping-fathers-interested-in-fatherhood-program). What do you do? ![A Secret Weapon for Facilitators of Fatherhood Programs.jpg](https://www.fatherhood.org/hs-fs/hubfs/A%20Secret%20Weapon%20for%20Facilitators%20of%20Fatherhood%20Programs.jpg?width=452&name=A%20Secret%20Weapon%20for%20Facilitators%20of%20Fatherhood%20Programs.jpg "A Secret Weapon for Facilitators of Fatherhood Programs.jpg") **Use a *secret ballot* to make it safe for them to share. **  One of the challenges in facilitating a fatherhood program is group think--the tendency to follow the crowd and not offer a different or dissenting opinion. The social influence exerted by the group can create an environment that hinders sharing of such opinions--a safe environment that nurtures emotional intimacy. On the other hand, a group, with the help of a skilled facilitator, can nurture sharing of such opinions.** A skilled facilitator has a set a tools they can draw from to create a safe environment for emotional intimacy.** The secret ballot is one such tool. When you ask a question, for example, ask dads to write their responses on a piece of paper and place the responses in something like a hat, cup, or can. Then read their responses aloud. (Alternatively, you could ask one of the dads to read them or pass the responses around and have each dad read one of them until the dads have read all the responses.) Hopefully, the responses will reveal different and, possibly, opposing answers. When the answers do so, make sure the dads grasp that the answers are different and opposing **and ensure them that it's okay to share their thoughts even if they differ from or disagree with the thoughts of other dads in the group**. To add to your set of facilitation tools, I encourage you to register for our online, on-demand Effective Facilitation Certificate™ training. The training will help you become an even better facilitator, one with a range of tools at the ready to respond to the challenges that are inevitable when facilitating a fatherhood program. For more information and to register, click here.    **How complete is your facilitation tool belt? ** **Are you ready to become an even better facilitator? ** **Are you a dad looking for help? Please visit our Fatherhood Program Locator™ and enter your city and state on the map to find programs and resources in your community.** Date Published: 10/27/2016 Last Updated: 05/18/2018 ## Learn How to Build a Fatherhood Program That Works Download this free guide for a proven 7-step roadmap—from making the case and securing funding for your program, to launching and measuring real results! [Get The Guide Now!](https://www.fatherhood.org/starting-a-fatherhood-program) ![7-steps-starting-a-fatherhood_program](https://www.fatherhood.org/hs-fs/hubfs/Images/7-steps-starting-a-fatherhood_program.png?width=700&height=700&name=7-steps-starting-a-fatherhood_program.png) [ Previous ](https://www.fatherhood.org/championing-fatherhood/spotlight-pueblo-colorado) [ Next ](https://www.fatherhood.org/championing-fatherhood/6-tips-to-protect-your-child-from-bullying) ## Related Articles ### [Five Leadership Practices That Build Father-Inclusive Organizations Image created with GPT Image 2. Creating a father-inclusive organization doesn't happen through a new but isolated fatherhood program, staff training on how to include fathers, or ... Read More](https://www.fatherhood.org/championing-fatherhood/five-leadership-practices-that-build-father-inclusive-organizations) ### [Beyond Graduation: Keeping Fathers Connected Image created with GPT Image 2. Many organizations do a good job recruiting fathers and helping them complete a fatherhood program. But what happens after the program ends? How do ... Read More](https://www.fatherhood.org/championing-fatherhood/beyond-graduation-keeping-fathers-connected) ### [Funding A Father-Inclusive Effort For Non-Governmental Organizations Image created with GPT Image 2. Many non-governmental organizations (NGOs) struggle to identify funding sources for fatherhood initiatives and programs. After all, beyond the ... 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