Beyond the Lesson Plan: Building Rapport with Dads

Rapport is the trusting connection that dads feel when they are seen, heard, and valued, rather than being managed, judged, or “fixed.” It builds through the consistent, small but powerful signals that you empathize with and care about every dad you serve.

I spoke with four seasoned fatherhood practitioners from two organizations, who shared how they build rapport with dads in their communities. This conversation included Brett Baumgartel, Reintegration Coordinator of Goodwill of Southwestern Pennsylvania, along with his colleagues Earl Greer and Milton Dancy, who serve as both facilitators and case managers for their renewed Fatherhood FORGE project. Joining them was Terry Seay, Program Manager for the Buffalo Fatherhood Initiative of Western New York.

Here are some insights from my conversation that reinforce why building rapport with dads is critical, along with practical tactics you can use to build it.

Why is Building Rapport with Dads So Critical?

These seasoned practitioners shared that building rapport is critical because, without it, dads are unlikely to feel the sense of trust and emotional safety that contributes to a fatherhood program’s success. Regardless of the curriculum used, fatherhood programs are most successful when dads know they are in a safe space to talk openly and to receive encouragement from peers and facilitators. And when you slow down and truly listen to dads’ experiences, it deepens dads’ sense of trust and emotional safety.

How Can I Build Rapport with Dads?

Building rapport with dads starts with an intentional, relationship-centered approach that prioritizes building trust and emotional safety over a curriculum’s content. Here are three tactics that were shared by practitioners for building rapport.

• Establish a connection with dads right away. Call dads after they register for your program. Introduce yourself, explain what to expect, and reduce any anxiety they might have about participating. Connecting with dads early shows them that you care about them individually and increases the likelihood that they will attend and actively engage.
• Greet each dad and offer a handshake upon arrival as often as possible. This gesture signals respect, reduces anxiety, and immediately begins building rapport. 
• Learn and use every dad’s first name during the initial session or meeting. This gesture instantly boosts dads’ sense of belonging and trust in the group.

Create a safe space for interaction by telling dads clearly that their lives and challenges matter more than simply “getting through” content, then backing that up with your actions in the room. When you learn names, listen deeply, and slow down enough to honor men’s real experiences, you show that this is a place where dads can be honest, support one another, and grow alongside their children and communities.

When dads share something that makes them feel vulnerable, how does your immediate response build rapport? Does it show that you hear them, respect them, and welcome them to share again?

Do you intentionally using each dad’s name and strengths to build a personal connection so that he feels value

If you want to improve your facilitation skills and build better rapport with dads, check out National Fatherhood Initiative®’s on-demand Effective Facilitation Certificate™.